Wiggy's World

Its 2.10am, and I cant sleep!! Seem to have one or two things on my mind, and one or 2 decisions that could change a few things, and also shape things in the future.  Also playing Call of Duty online for 6 hours dont help!  I close my eyes, and all I can see is hundreds of gunmen running at me and shooting me

Gotta love old Robbo on the BBS Sport site Made me chuckle… specially his ratings further down the page! Kinda echoed my sentiments

It was a very strange night, but an interesting one nonetheless.

First things first, it was nice not to have a pre-match interview with McClaren. You know, the one that left you feeling a bit like you’d eaten too many Quality Street.

This bloke Capello doesn’t do grins. You’re more likely to get a smile out of an undertaker’s cat.

Secondly, everyone at the Blue Bell looked at the team-sheet and said ‘Brown! Upson! JENAS!!!!’ and then just shrugged. ‘Cos we realised the new man had been doing his homework – and that the team on the pitch were the ones who had played the best when he was there.

Actually I was beginning to think the only reason JJ was ever in a squad was because he was always willing to caddie of a Thursday.

However, the first half was rank. There are excuses but still it ‘beggars beyond belief’ (as one 606 ranter put it the other day) that these blokes behave for 40 minutes with all the familiarity of a bunch of London commuters.

(If you do visit the capital, don’t for goodness sake say hello to someone you’ve never met – before you know it you’re on the London Transport Police’s wanted list. Just say nowt and attend very actively to your baggage. Attend! Attend!)

It got better in the second half, not least ‘cos the Gaffissimo proved he had a sense of humour by bringing on SWP and Crouch at the same time. Not so much a substitution as a study in anthropology.

Even though I am congenitally unable to accept that a bloke who is 6 and a half feet can be a neat footy player, I have to accept that Crouch is rapidly making himself as undroppable as a stick in a pit bull’s mouth. And Rooney looked quite the lad for the last half-hour with the big man alongside.

Perhaps the biggest indication of what a tough job Fabio has ahead of him was the moment when the England team got a thorough booing for keeping hold of the ball.

You could feel the tension in every Englishman’s very being, ‘cos no one had thought to tonk it high and long toward the corner flag, while shouting ‘Run, Wazza! Run!’

Never mind the players getting educated, some of the dimwits who sit in the stands need to get a grip on reality. Hoof’n'hope is not the way forward.

Still, at least the reality TV show that is Pampered Brats Go To Boot Camp has begun with a win. And you’ve got to like Capello’s unforgiving management style. No WAGs, no nicknames… and where will they get the intellectual conversation from without the Game Boys?

My WAG was in the Bell last night. It was the usual fare from her:

10 mins – Oh! Are we playing in red?
21 mins – Rooney’s getting better with age. I wonder if he’s using Colleen’s moisturiser?
40 mins – Did we score? Who’s that? Jermaine who? Oh yes, the one who went to Portsmouth. He’s very dishy, etc, etc.

And my own personal favourite:
62 mins – the pitch looks nice – why can’t you do that with our lawn?

By the way, I’m not saying you’re all like that, ladies, but my missus is.

Any road, here’s the scores on the doors for Episode 1 of the Capellovian Revolution.

1. David James – calm enough, save for the last minute when he proved he’s still capable of turning from master keeper into p***** vampire bat at the cross of a ball. 6/10

2. Wes Brown – or was it Des Brown? From the yelps in the Blue Bell with every dreadful touch it could have been James Brown -’Take him off for Bridge, c’mon, Take him off for Bridge! Owwwww!!!’ Incapability Brown is probably the best summation of his performance. 2/10

3. Ashley Cole – slippy boots didn’t help. Needed another stud or two but as he’s allegedly the biggest stud out there, he probably thought otherwise. 2/10

4. Gareth Barry – average, but just about did enough. 6/10

5. Rio Ferdinand – dozed off for their goal, but he is the second or third name on the team-sheet. 6/10

6. Matthew Upson – dunno why he was picked ahead of the turncoat Woodgate. OK though. 6/10

7. David Bentley – A Bentley, not yet a Rolls Royce. He had a good game but let’s just calm ourselves a little. 8/10

8. Jermaine Jenas – deserved to be picked, but there’s summat missing with this lad. He reminds me of Mark Ramprakash. He’s got all the wherewithal, but none of the… oh what’s the word… balls. Maybe a stint on Strictly Come Dancing will bring him out of himself. 6/10

9. Wayne Rooney – great once Crouchy arrived. I liked the fact he was busy bellowing away to his team-mates like a young bull. Looks like Capello’s told him to get his message across. Good. 8/10

10. Steven Gerrard – got better, too. Decent, but not the best player on the park. 7/10

11. Joe Cole – cracking. If he can stop thinking that with Scholes’s retirement there’s a vacancy for someone who tackles like Mr Magoo on a Kung Fu course then he’s got all we need. 9/10

Subs
Wright-Phillips – scored the winner but sometimes looks just plain bloody awful. Lennon’s a better bet in my opinion. 6/10
Crouch – the real deal now. And Rafa’ll keep him fresh, don’t you worry about that. 8/10
Hargreaves – like Barry but with longer-life batteries in him. 6/10

As for Michael Owen, it was great that Capello bagged him. The lad needs a wake-up call.

All in all? Not much has changed. The players still look inflexible. We still need the 4-4-2 for now. But we are all going to give the new bloke time.

As Shearer put it, if they’re crap with this guy in charge then let’s face it, they’re just crap full stop.

LINK

Hmmm… Fed up of being stuck in this dead-end job, where it appears I cant go any higher, so after evaluating my options, I’ve decided I’m gonna have to make my millions another way.

• I might travel to Thailand, meet some bloke called Xian Chow, get him to train me, and then become lethal international star in the art of Kickboxing
• Maybe I will move to Australia and open up an Crocodile sanctuary, and other random wildlife related homes for killer animals
• Maybe I should move to America, and become a Lawnmower to the stars or something!! I mean look at what happened in Desperate Housewvies (one of the only times I watched it) The gardener/hired help ended up getting his end away with the fit woman
• Another way is to put a few quid on the Euro Millions this friday, with a jackpot of about £95 million!! Then I could buy stags, take out numerous loans, and leave them on the brink of relegation – Oh wait half thats true anyway

I’ll have a think about which is the more viable option, and maybe go down that path

Last night made me chuckle.  Jermaine Jenas IS NOT an international player, even tho he did score, hell even I could have scored that!!  Wes Brown or according to John Motson on one or two occasions… “Wayne Brown” does not look like an International right-back either.  Specially with Micah Richards on the bench, and Gary “Hoof it 60 yards” Neville may or may not ever return to full fitness. Oh well! Capello seems to have gotten alot more out of the team in the 2nd half than the retard we had as our last manager EVER got out of them!  FFS you’re meant to be their boss…. you cant go round calling your players by nicknames, or they’ll never bloody get your respect.

Had a few games online with Crit on Call of Duty 4, and had a laugh at some of the stupid-ass people that use the game! God their accents make me cringe! At one point I think me and Crit must have stumbled upon a Germans only game   IF i’d decided not to have a beer with my tea, and then another one shortly after, I’d have gone to the pub last night, as Becca text me and said did I fancy meeting her and Marissa at the Cockle for the quiz.  Ended up chatting to her for a while about this and that, before deciding to watch Kickboxer! Love the film, altho It got to the point where I could take it no more, and fell asleep before the fight at the end! Gutted!!! Will have to get it on DVD now

Always makes me chuckle when they somehow get hold of your personal info, and try to get you into their club for your birthday of something

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So it all started on a cold and blustry Friday evening. Got home from work, and decided to go and partake in the maxxd footy. Started off in net, performing my usual heroics, but then got bored, specially once Alanman scored past me So got one or two others to go in net for a bit. In my opinion it was a bit too busy that night, but still managed to put the ball past Coop twice, with brilliant finished (if i say so myself) From there I got home to warm up, and had a blast on the xbox, whilst chatting to Bagi and one or two others on msn, and then decided to watch Save the last dance, and then Stomp the Yard. For some reason I was in a proper dance film mood! Maybe it was chatting to Bagi about the sat night we were about to endure.

Got up Saturday morning, and had a mess about on the 360 again, and tidied the house a little, before heading off to meet Bagi and Moorey over at McArthur Glen. Got myself some new Jeans, and 2 new tops, and wound Bagi up, cos I think his mum still buys his clothes, cos he is sooo indecisive it’s untrue!! Moorey was moping around like us fellas do when shopping with the missus, making it clear that he wanted to be at home or sommat From McArthur Glen we buggered off into Mansfield, and we had a bit of fun down the A38 Before parking up I did a little lap or the circuit, then dropped the car off in the 4 Seasons car-park, and went to meet dumb and dumber. Did very little apart from mess about in town, filling in forms to win a BMW in 4 seasons, and taking the piss out of cinderella, who wasn’t allowed out with us that night

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So I damaged my arm Wednesday night twating about on the punch-bag thing, which I’ll admit was my own stupid fault, but I didnt help myself by helping unload a shit load of cheap and nasty tables and chairs which our wise old leader has had imported from China or where ever it is yesterday morning   Aside from that work was quietish, so I helped Crit tidy out loads of crap from above his printing bit, ready for another stupid delivery or sommat! Suppose I’d miss the free exercise were I to leave here

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